Forgive Your Addictive And Abusive Parent: Here’s How You Can Do It
An addicted person doesn’t only impart harm on themselves but also to the people around them. Friends and family go through emotional stress and pain almost as much as an addicted person experiences. Within the family, children always suffer the most. A survey suggests that over 23.5 million Americans are prone to addiction each year, but over a staggering 28 million children are raised up in homes which have addicted parents. Among that 28 million, a good 17 million have grown up into adults now, and they continue to fight with a new dilemma – forgiveness. Trying to adjust and rework the relationship is an uphill task for them, but it’s nearly impossible for kids to forgive their parents who are addicted to drugs.
Coming Face To Face With Your Addicted Parents
Being raised in a home that has been spoiled by drug addiction can have adverse impacts on kids. They face challenges right from the inception of their childhood, quite opposite to what kids should go through in normal homes. Children of drug-addicted parents generally experience emotional or physical abuse. They suffer so much as they grow up that emotional scars are bound to traumatize the child for as long as they live. If you’re one of them and wonder whether you should forgive the adult in your home, you must realize the real meaning of forgiveness.
What Does Forgiveness Imply?
There are many misconceptions regarding this. Most of the time, people are of the opinion that an individual who acquires forgiveness is the one who gains. That’s not the case. The person who is forgiving is the one who benefits the most. That’s why forgiving somebody is entirely a personal choice, and everything else is secondary. You might cling on to the pain that has been inflicted on you by your drug-addicted parent, and gradually, this feeling gets transformed into growing resentment and anger. If you’re asked to let go, you might think it’s impossible for you to do so, but remember that you would do yourself the biggest favor of your life.
Forgive And Move On
If you let it go, you won’t be bogged down by that anger and hatred that have been growing inside you all these years. When you grow up into an adult, you can’t let your mind be dictated with all those hard feelings that have deprived you of all the happiness that you deserved. You need to move on. You need to forgive to prevent that old pain from hurting you for such a long time. Contrary to beliefs, forgiveness doesn’t need a response. Most addicts have a tough time accepting the fact that they have a huge problem. Forget about realizing that they are putting someone in great pain and distress. If an addicted individual loves to live in denial, what kind of an apology do you expect? You won’t ever get an apology, and that’s the most unfortunate part of the whole thing. So, forgive and move on.
Know Their Story
Forgiveness is all about how you try to realize and understand. If you have undergone a traumatic experience at the hands of your addicted parents, forgiving them might seem to be something you can never come to terms with. Well, you’re not the only child who is facing this issue day in and day out. You might have been ignored since your childhood, mentally or physically tortured to such an extent that you have nothing but bitter feelings for your drug-addicted parents. Such traumas can prevent you from pardoning them, but you need to let go of this negativity, and this plays a major part in your forgiveness. In case you want to stand face to face with your drug-addicted parents, you need to address all the traumatic experiences you have had, Although it’s not easy, you need to get to the root of the problem and learn their story, especially how and why exactly your parents became addicts.
You need to talk to your parents, know their side of the story, understand what they went through, and how they had to struggle with their addiction. This way, you will do your parents and yourself a favor big time. Realizing their experience would surely help you a lot, and forgiving them will undoubtedly be a bit easier for you. It’s never too late to build a better relationship with your parents, and instead of turning away from them forever, find it in you to forgive them.
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